You Look Like You Need A Hug

It's Monday...You look like you could use a hug.

Matador at Monumental El Paso, Bullfight (Fiesta Brava), San Luis Potosi, Mexico

by Russell Gordon

I sipped on my glass of red, looked out over the forest landscape and felt his gaze upon me. 

“Am I in your book?”

I smiled, emptied the glass of its contents and looked him dead in the eyes, “Of course, it is a book on all of my relationship mistakes.”

He had a full belly laugh and almost fell out of his lounge chair.  He poured more wine into my glass as his laugh quieted. 

From his body frame one could tell he may have been very good at baseball at one point in time.  His stalky, muscular build would play well for him on first base.  Lord knows, first base was where he always wanted to play with me.  His face was tanned, chiseled with a small amount of stubble left over from the day before.  His dark hair seemed to always stay in place even though he never did anything more than run his fingers through it.  He once said to me before going out, “I don’t have to try, so I don’t.”  He was always very blunt and got right to the point.  It was what attracted me to him in the first place when I was younger.  Some how this brute, blunt man captured my attention.

“You love me.”  He said this as if he was so sure of the answer.  He was always so sure of himself.  His ego practically choked me on occasion. 

No, I didn’t love him now, I never did and I never will.  I didn’t verbalize this to him.  I was silent.  I was starting to think it was a mistake just sipping wine with him out in the open air.  I could feel him move closer to my chair, his hand on the back of my chair leg.

“I already told my friends that I’m in your book.”  His voice was the type of voice that carried across a crowded room.  People often told him to calm down, speak softer.  We attended a friend’s party, where those very words were spoken to him in a harsh whisper.  His reply, in high volume of course, to this day makes me laugh, “I can’t and I won’t, Dorothy has trouble hearing and I'm loud, we’re the perfect match.”  His friends described us as The Bull and The Matador. This memory quickly faded and I felt uncomfortable with what I was thinking but I knew I had to say it.

“You do know the book is called War on Love?  How do you want me to portray you?  I’m going to tell the truth.”  I took a quick sip of wine to wet my lips.  “You’ll make it in.  I’m not sure if you’ll like what or where I put you within the book.”

He smiled, picked up the bottle from the cement floor and topped off my glass, “You break hearts for a living.”

“Don’t be like that.  We both know what you were doing when we met.”

“I know, I know...Seriously though, Am I in the book?”  His eyes pierced my right eyeball.

“Oh no!  Not the crazy eyes.  Stop looking at me that way.  Fine! Yes, you’re in the book.  Why is it so important to you?”

“I just wanted to hear you say it.”  He sat against the back of the lounge chair and took a swig of wine from the mouth of the bottle.  In true Bull fashion, he let out a rumbling bletch that echoed through the trees.  This was not as 'cute' as I thought it was in years past.

Sexercises Are Back!

Over the recent months I have received a large amount of feedback in regard to The Sexercises in the original Amazing Love Diet.  I have a few persons that were against them, saying that it read like a Penthouse Forum.  (Not sure if this is a good or a bad thing.) And then, I had a great number of people that found they loved the Sexercises!  Some were very disappointed that I had taken them out.  For those of you out there that don't know what Sexercises are, these would be different sexual positions that will help to tone your body.  What could be wrong with that?  I just happen to explain briefly the benefits...Now, isn't that a fun tidbit of information.

Those that I've heard from in regard to the old version of Amazing Love Diet, said that most of the positions they already knew about.  For them, the Sexercises were a nice reminder to engage and explore with their partner.  I have heard that it was a nice refresher for their relationship.  I felt this feedback was powerful enough to add the Sexercises back into the book.  I had a large number of people who voted for the Sexercises, more so than those against them.  So...I did just that.  Amazing Love Diet now features Sexercises!  

Download or pick up Amazing Love Diet today!

Download digital copy from Amazon Here

Order Paperback from Lulu Here.

*****If you've purchased any version of Amazing Love Diet please email me at lazypersonaltraining@gmail.com and I will give you the latest version as a thank you.

Love is Hard

As I am finishing up my new book, War on Love, I am in a continual cycle of revisiting my past love affairs.  Which, at times, is very emotional for me.  Everyday I write about love.  Everyday I am engrossed in this topic.  I write about it’s beauties and horrors.  Making an effort to paint what true love really looks like.  Often as I write, I am glad to be where I am currently.  Glad to have moved on; free and clear.  I am, of course, happy for these relationships; the lessons, the happiness and sorrow.  Looking back, I am able to see that I was grateful to have loved and been loved as much as I have.  I am still young, have more love to experience and learn about.  I have have been fortunate enough to have loved enough for a 1000 lifetimes and it doesn't look like I will stop loving anytime soon.

During this reflective artistic period, there have been a few instances where I’ve contemplated, “Did I make the right decision?  Am I in the right place?  Is there hope if there's still love there?”  As I write this book, I remember so many wonderful points in time.  Flash memories play in my mind like a theater trailer...Staying up all night with Captain America.  Not wanting to shut my eyes because I didn’t want to miss a second while laying next to him ... Listening to BigRed tell one of his larger than life stories.  I could lose hours in my day listening to him ...Kissing Captain of the Industry under a willow tree in Boston Common.  The sun peaking through the branches.  Our hands interlocked.  His smile warming my heart in the autumn air.  I remember him brushing my hair off of my face.  I felt his fingertips tickle my rosy cheeks.

Then I remember the pain...Waiting in the airport terminal for Captain America to call to say we’re making a huge mistake.  Crying as I boarded the plane because I knew we really were finished... The final disappointment from BigRed that numbed my heart.  I was disappointed in myself for trusting him once again... Then on the Captain of the Industry’s ocean-view balcony, staring into his eyes and not recognizing the man I had fallen in love with so many years before.  How am I just now seeing the real him?  There was a shadow of this man, distorted and irregular. 

I know I’m not perfect...far from it.  I have broken hearts.  I have played silly games.  I have been selfish.  I have been cruel.  BigRed held me to his chest as I hit him and told him to just leave me.  The next morning, he said something that has stuck to my soul, “I almost got in my car and left you there to fend for yourself.  Any other girl, I would have...but not my Doro.  I could never leave you.  So, here we are.  What are we going to do now?”  This was the very moment I realized how much of a jerk I can be and how someone can love despite the harsh reality of the situation.

At what point do we give up?

At what point do we say enough is enough?

At what point do we stay and fight?


I’ve come to the conclusion, over the years, that love is work.  There are no guarantees that any of us will find happiness with the people we love.  There are no magic formulas for relationships.  No quick fixes or easy roads.  You may never know when the right moment to give up or keep up the fight.  When push comes shove, love is hard and sometimes it feels like we’re fighting a senseless battle in which no one truly wins or leaves without shedding blood.

“...The truth hurts and lies worse.  How can I give anymore when I love you a little less than before...”  - James Morrison...I have used James Morrison's music on multiple occasions.  I love his music.  I can't get enough of him!

30 Day Yoga Challenge

A few months ago I felt my hips becoming tighter.  My theory was confirmed when my cousin allowed me to use her massage appointment.  The therapist mentioned that my hips were tight and I needed to do some extra stretches.  My tightness may have also been from being very uncomfortable when he started massaging my legs and hips.  He lifted my legs a wee bit too high off the massage table for my liking.  I felt my lady bits meet the cool air.  I have the habit of not wearing a lady shield (Underwear) while I receive massages.  I find clothes are not conducive for my to relaxation.   Of course, this was the dialog in my head...(Female massage therapist never raise my legs this high...Can he see anything?...Try to relax...You’re ok...Thank goodness I’ve been waxed...Ok, you’re relaxed, he’s a professional.  I’m sure he knows how to cover everything up...Right?)  After this, I started thinking about getting back into yoga...

Kick Off The Month of Love

Amazing Love Diet 

In Honor of The Month of Love, Amazing Love Diet Ebook will be $2.99 for the month of February.  Download this little book onto your digital readers and mobile devices.  Happy Lovin' Everyone!

For Amazon Click Here                       For Lulu Click Here 

*****Book cover photographed by Bill Hoenk Photography*****  (Bill is an incredibly talented photographer, whom made me feel more than comfortable being in my invisible bikini.  He has an array of talents in the photography field for your needs, not just nudes...But maybe after you read my book, you'll be inspired to take it all off in front of a camera for a wonderful memory...Respectfully and tastefully of course...Wink, wink.)

Be Fearless

{via little.lovely}

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or saying that we are not ready.  The challenge will not wait.  Life does not look back. A moment is more than enough time for us to decided whether or not to accept our destiny. ” - The Devil and Miss Prym by Paulo Coelho.



We have two days left in the first month of the year.  Finish what you can and plan for what you can't.  Before we enter into The Month of Love, I want you to clear away all the bad and the negative.  February will be a fresh, new month.  Which means, just like that you will have a new beginning.  So prepare for that new beginning.  What you give in your attitude is what you will receive.  Whatever your focus is on; good or bad thoughts, they will grow.  Make sure you go into your new start with positive vibes.  If you’ve been having any difficulty this past month, take a look at the problem from a different prospective.  Learn from your mistakes. Turn whatever negative or energy draining situation, into something more.  If need be, look at your situation from the outside looking in.  What would someone see from the other side?  Or maybe pretend to be the person you most respect and ask yourself, “How would they handle the situation?  What would they do?”  If you were in a funk the whole month, change one part of your daily routine.  You may find yourself breathing new life into your soul.  We are all afraid of change.  We all have fears.  Don’t let your fear get in the way of being truly great.  Be Fearless.

Dr. Seuss Is A Genius!

Dr. Seuss

I have many heroes...One just happens to be Dr. Seuss.  I often find myself thinking, "What would Dr. Seuss do?"  I would love to live in his mind for just one day.  It must have been magical.  When I lived in San Diego I would often drive by his old house and just try to pick up some of the creative energy.  If you have visited San Diego and really took in the surrounds, you would be able to see the inspiration he gathered for some of his drawings.  San Diego, especially La Jolla, looks very similar to his artwork in his books.  There are funky treas, roads that wind and wind and so many colors that paint the San Diego backdrop. 

Before I moved to San Diego my sister, BigSis, gave me a very special book, Oh The Places You'll Go.  It is typically given to high school graduates but she thought it would be appropriate since I was setting off on a new adventure.  And it was.  To the naked eye Dr. Seuss's books appear to be simple children's book.  Reality is,  I think they serve adults more than they do children.  These books are inspirational, complicated and can give motivation to live the life you're supposed to lead. 

Page From "Oh The Places You'll Go."

I like this poem and this photo for days when fear tries to enter your life.  Beat it with a barbed wire bat!

December is the M.E Month

I tamed this gorilla...I'm that good.

We have now entered the last month of 2011...Then it’s the last year in the Mayan Calender. 

For the month of December, I feel it is only fitting to dub it the ME Month.  M is for More and E is for Exploring.  December 2011 is now officially the month of More Exploring.  Explore life, have an open mind, help others and above all help yourself.  Have more in your life.  More new experiences.  More love.  Move time to yourself.  More time with the ones you care about the most.  More adventures big or small.  More silliness.  More laughter.  I think you get the point.  This month, more is more and you should have your fill!

Ways to get the most out of the M.E Month.

-Small town adventures: Get your friends together and do a scavenger hunt.

-Donate your time to your local community: Nothing feels better than helping someone else

-Wake up and decide to laugh all day

-Plan something just for you: Maybe it’s just an hour in a salt bath or maybe it’s a full weekend of doing nothing and talking to no one. 

-Learn something new: Take a cooking class...My personal favorite was learning to make truffles!

-Listen to your heart in all matters, it always knows best.

-Don’t listen to people, do what feels right

-Do something that scares you

-Plan a trip around something you love: Can’t get enough of food. Plan a food road trip!

-Write your life “To Do” list: Start doing something on that list this month

-Explore the local library: I love spending time in the library.  The smell of books, reading in a corner and then checking out a new book, it's an adventure for the mind.

-Take a chance in love: Don’t hold back if you really and truly love someone, tell them.

-Take a fitness challenge: I have heard doing Bikram Yoga for 30 days will change your life and your body.  I’ve done it before and loved it...Try to find a studio that isn’t smelly...It can be hard to focus on holding a position when you smell something funky in the room.

-Say Yes To Everything: Have you seen the movie Yes Man?  He changed his life with one simple word, Yes.  It’s a funny movie and I love the meaning behind it.

Your world is about to open up and change for the better.  Take a risk.  Be ready for it by knowing that there are great rewards in pushing your limits and seeing how far your spirit will take you.  Enjoy ME Month!

Wildest Dreams - Amazing Love Diet

www.sugarandshinyobjects.com

When I was younger I used to swing on my swing set, look up to the sky and think of the wonderful life I was going to have once I grew breasts and got my very own driver’s license.  Never in my wildest dreams did I think it would come true.  My first book is out and I’m so excited about the wonderful things people have been saying.  I feel truly blessed and supported...(Kinda like my breasts when they visit Victoria's Secret.)

I am having a contest where you may win a free copy of Amazing Love Diet.  The first way to win is go to Amazing Love Diet’s Fan Page Here.  “Like” the page and you will be entered to win a free book.  The people that “Like” the page between now and the 150th person will be entered to win the book.  The second way to win is to share the post that is on Amazing Love Diet’s wall, “Share the Love” .  Once you have shared, write in the comments below the post, “Share the Love”, this is your entry.  There will be one winner chosen at random from each category.  In total, two ‘fans’ that will win a copy of Amazing Love Diet.  The contest will end when the page reaches 150 fans.  Best of luck and as always Much Love!


Here is the link to Amazing Love Diet's Fan Page!

Available Now Amazing Love Diet

Well I knew this day would come...Amazing Love Diet is on shelves!  Best way to purchase is by clicking HERE.  This will bring you to my Lulu's Author Spotlight.  Much Love to you Always!

Book/Cooking Club

While out to dinner with some of my childhood friends last month, one of girls suggested that we start a book club.  This quickly evolved to finding good reads about food and try our hand at cooking some of the recipes.  Honestly, best idea ever!  I loved our last book, Lunch in Paris.  The writer's descriptions of Paris and her description on the food constantly had my mouth watering.  There's a great part in the book, that we all agreed with, (I can't quote since I don't have the book in front of me.) that compares eating to sex.  A woman that is picky about what she eats, will probably not rip her lover's clothes off.  But a girl that hasn't put down her spoon and devours her chocolate souffle will probably show her lover a thing or two.  Pick up the book for yourself...It's entertaining and there are some yummy recipes.  We each made something from the book and we will take turns hosting the event.  Sorry, I was so distracted by the food, I forgot to take photos of everything. 


Book/Cooking Club 1st Meeting Menu: Hosted by The Domestic Diva
Mushroom Turnovers
Fennel Salad
Pork
Haricot Vert
Chocolate Souffle

Mushroom Turnovers...Yum!

Pork and to the right are the Apples and Onions to make the Delicious Sauce!

Chocolate Souffles with Whipped Cream. (I covered them with whipped cream.  I don't care if it's wrong or right.)

I can't give you any of the recipes from the book but I can share with you my recipe for whipped cream. It's very easy to make.

I am bad when it comes to measuring.  I grew up in a house where if it's the right color or you can smell it then it's ready.

Homemade Whipped Cream
Heavy whipping cream
Sugar (I think about a 1/2 cup)
Vanillia extract (I would say about a tablespoon)

Put mixing bowl in fridge.  The cream mixes best with a cold bowl.  Combine ingredients in mixer on high and add ingredients to taste.  Enjoy!

*Our next book is Comfort Me With Apples by Ruth Reichl.  This was my choice and I will be hosting the next gathering.  I couldn't put this book down when it first came out in 2001.  I am excited to relive it once again!

New Website

I have been working on this for awhile now.  I wasn't sure which direction I was going to go in.  I  decided to stay within the Blogger family.  I will use my new blog/website as platform for my new books and other exciting ventures.  I will, or course, still continue to do the Lazy Girl posts but I will also be posting on my other site as well.  So, check it out!  Find My New Site Here. I am so excited about it.  It's still a work in progress but I couldn't be more thrilled.  Much Love.

Lunch In Paris

“While still in my bed, my thoughts turn to you, my Immortal Beloved.”  I am listening to Beethoven’s Piano Concerto no. 5 in E-Flat Major, while I drink my latest smoothie creation and I read my new book, Lunch in Paris.  I have only just begun the story of this woman’s love affair with her new man, her new city and her love affair with French cuisine.  Her descriptions have scratched my memories of the past 10 years.  A time machine, bouncing me around through my own love affairs, food I have experienced around the world and of course, Paris.  It allows me to reflect on my current year and how lucky that I have been these past few months.  If you love food and you want to be transported to a new city without leaving your current town, (Or you are unable to leave your city for whatever reason.) then may I suggest picking up this book.  I am only just beginning my affair and already I am in lust.

Shared Blog: Born This Way

I am a big fan of Huffington Post.  I've been reading it since it first started years ago.  I had to share this.  I love this post by Paul V.  Whom is the Blogger behind Born This Way.  It's in honor of National Coming Out Day...Which just so happens to be today!

Here is an excerpt...You may view the rest by clicking HERE.  It's a great read for sure with some pretty amazing photos.  Enjoy!

I'm extremely honored and thrilled to be a part of The Huffington Post's spotlight for National Coming Out Day, and to feature some stories and photos from my blog (see the slidshow below).

The whole concept of sharing our growing-up-LGBTQ experiences came from seeing my friend Dennis' photo (featured in the slideshow below), which immediately struck me. It showed that even at 3 years old (and before we're self-conscious), our innate selves, personalities and mannerisms are innocently captured on film. Sometimes in a blatant pose, other times just simply seen in our faces...

What's Your Favorite Thing?

When life gets you down, you need to stop and think, “What will pick my spirits up?”

So, I want you to have a go to list of the things in your life or something that makes you smile, laugh or just makes you happy.  It’s your Favorite Things List.  This list will help change your mood from negative to positive.

Here are some examples from my list:

-My Family
-My Nieces Laughing
-My babe Jack
-Red Lipstick
-Flirty Dresses
-Thigh High Boots...ok any style of boot will put a smile on my face.
-Paris
-London
-Tapas
-Brunch
-Thanksgiving
-The Bahamas
-The Beach with the sun warming my skin
-Snow Angels
-A fire, A book and a glass of red wine
-Laughing with friends
-Live Music/Concerts
-Christmas Breakfast (My family goes all out...sooo good!)
-And above everything Love

Make your list and see how your day will turn around.  Keep it close to you for those moments when you need a quick pick-me-up.  Your mood will change faster than you think.

October - Higher Learning

My own personal theme for the month of October will be Higher Learning.  I’ve made a few goals for this month.  Tone my tummy (I am always working on something in the gym.)...Relearn Spanish and French.  Also, some of my close friends and I have starting a small book club dedicated to but not limited to reading about food.  A major goal of mine this month is to read more.  I consume about a book a week.  My goal is to bump that up to five books total for the month.  My hope is that this will extend my inspirational and intellectual pallet.  I find the more I read, the better a writer I become.  I am in a constant state of perfecting what brings me joy...this thing called writing.  If anyone has any suggestions to what I should read, I am open to them.  For the book club, we will be reading Lunch in Paris: A love story with recipes by Elizabeth Bard.

For the past few months I have been meeting more and more creative types that have inspired me greatly.  I befriended an inventor (Guitar Hero) whom has inspired me as well as makes me laugh to no end. I have had the privilege of meeting numerous talented artists and writers that I feel I can bounce ideas off of.  One in particular I am quite fond of, I call him The Poet.  He’s an extremely talented artist and poet.  He’s dark, devilishly handsome with intense eyes that peer right into your soul.  Um, yeah ladies, a handsome man with lyrical lips.  Could you ask for anything more? Through our conversations, The Poet has given me a few homework assignments.  One in particular is to read Henry Miller’s Tropic of Capricorn, followed by Tropic of Cancer (Even though Capricorn is the sequel to Cancer.)  For what The Poet and I were discussing, these two novels make sense in this particular order.  I am so excited to read both of these books. 

So, onward and upward for the month of Higher Learning.  I am really looking forward to my horizons expanding...