Timing is Everything - You Can't Force These Things

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If you’ve had fall to your knees, crazy for each other type of love, it’s hard to have anything but.  Years ago I went to a psychic who said to me, “You’ve had the best…Once you’ve had that you can’t be with anyone who doesn’t have that same connection.  You need that same powerful connection or better.”  She went on to describe the man I would marry.  I was hoping she would start describing Alexander Skarsgard and she did say a few descriptive words that could very well be; older but not an old man (Her words not mine), worldly, charismatic, educated and passionate.  She went on to explain his personality; Strong, good for me and kind.  Followed by a physical appearance of which I won’t discuss here but the physical appearance was not exactly that of Alexander...bummer...She gave a few details of his work…Again, I won’t share it now. 

The explanation of this man I would be with was something I wanted and needed to hear at the time.  I was in limbo with BigRed.  She told me to stop seeing him...In fact, scolded me and told me to run away, as far away as I could get from him.  “You are going to have to distance yourself and I mean, hop on a plane and don’t come back.  He’s too hard and you’re too soft.  He will only continue to hurt you and he’ll never let you go.”  I knew this in my heart to be true but I wanted to believe in us.  How could I not, we felt like destiny.  When we came together, it was love at first sight.  We had such passion for each other, he made me laugh and when things were good, they were great.  Listening to her explain the alternative to BigRed made me think and reconsider…Knowing I could have something and someone I’ve always wanted was appealing.

Now, after recently going through a break-up, my eyes have opened to who I really am, and what I really want.  This past break-up was maybe the easiest I have ever been through.  No regrets, no shoulda, woulda, couldas and the ending was final for both parties.  A clean, no fuss, no mess break…Something I’m not used to and grateful to have experienced.  I’m armed with the knowledge; timing is everything and you can’t force these things.  I’ll end today with my Mother’s long-standing advice.  These are the only two words any male or female needs to hear in regard to relationships…Never settle.

A few posts that mention BigRed:

Love at first sight

http://www.lazypersonaltraining.com/2012/01/love-at-first-sight.html#.UVN0ZIU5i5s

Love, Wine and the In Between

http://www.lazypersonaltraining.com/2012/02/love-wine-and-in-between.html#.UVN3EYU5i5s

Love is Hard

http://www.lazypersonaltraining.com/2012/05/love-is-hard.html#.UVO5e4U5i5s

There Are No Wasted Relationships

The many lessons and teaching my Mother have bestowed upon me about love and life is that there are no wasted relationships.  This can be a hard concept to fathom when you’re going through a break-up.  Did I just waste all that time with this person?  What was the point of being with them?  How could I have been so foolish?  How could I have been so wrong?  At 31, I have finally moved on from these post break-up interrogations.  I’m armed with one phrase that gets me through break-ups; Romantic, Friends, Life or Career, “There are no wasted relationships.” 

My Mother taught me this valuable message young but it wasn’t until I went through my biggest break-up that her words really resonated with me.  I had spent years with someone I was building a future with.  We had mapped out our hopes, dreams and desires; Our wedding ceremony, when we would start having children, how many children we wanted, how we would spend our money, Where to spend our holidays, places we wanted to travel to and how we saw ourselves when we are old and grey.  Through out the course of our relationship we had each made sacrifices, compromises and changed emotionally and mentally.  We had grown together until the end, when we grew apart.  What once was sweet became sour, setting us each on different paths.

When you have this history, when two people form a foundation, a bond and then that bond is severed, it’s only natural to let doubt creep in about the connection and all those good feelings that were once shared.  We tend to not validate the relationship because we feel we have failed or there is a belief this could make it easier to move forward.  I take a few thoughts away from my Mother’s advice, “There are no wasted relationships.”

1.     The time spent was not a waste; you did have moments of happiness, joy and love.

2.     This person was what you needed at that time; whether to help you through a difficult patch, support you, teach/show you something about yourself you needed to know.

3.     Time is not wasted when you are learning and growing as an individual.

4.     What did you learn about yourself? 

5.     What did you learn about what you want and/or your beliefs?

6.     What did you learn about your worth?

As long as you can take away the lessons, you’ll understand that the time spent was not wasted, for you were learning more about yourself, you were learning on how to be your best self and what you want out of life.  Time is never wasted when you’re learning.  Please don’t let the aftertaste of a relationship spoil the sweetness of life. 

My Mother has an advice column on Nantucket Chronicle.  Ask her anything...Seriously, she's heard it all and she doesn't judge.

Like her page on Facebook, The Best Advice I Ever Got.  She'll have up-to-date advice and help for you and your friends.

Why Does This Keep Happening To Me?

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A man walks into a doctor’s office.  The doctor asks the man “What seems to be the problem?”  The man starts to hit his head and answers, “Doctor it hurts when I do this.”  The doctor responded, “Well then stop doing that.”

My Mother told my siblings and myself this joke when we were very young.  My Mother often used humor to teach us lessons.  If I or someone else keeps repeating the same actions over and over again while not gaining the results we are looking for and wonder why does this keeps happening to me?  It’s because I haven’t learned the lesson I needed to or maybe because I need a change of sorts. 

A great example: If I keep dating the same type of guy and wonder why do I always end up hurt? Maybe my lesson is to stop dating that type of guy.  I need to make a change.  Maybe the change is within myself, my surroundings, my way of thinking or how I go about dating all together.

The lessons we learn in life are actually easy once we decide we needed to learn them in the first place AND we accept the challenge of following through on the change they bring about in our lives.

The Wall Between Us

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“ ‘I’ve never seen anyone with such a thick wall up.’  That’s what he said to me…so I guess I have the thickest wall ever!”   As I looked into my friend’s sweet, distraught face I couldn’t help but think “There’s a reason for that wall and that’s ok, give it time.”

We’ve all been there.  We’ve all put up a wall or two.  Walls are meant for protection, to keep us safe from intruders.  It’s ok to use these protective mechanisms, that’s what our brains invented them for.  I’m not saying keep the wall up forever.  What I am saying is protect yourself, learn and grow from what has hurt you in the past.  Move on at a pace that feels right and comfortable.  Never force something before it feels right.  Everything happens in it’s own time whether you like it or not.  In this instantaneous day and age we forget we are born as humans, not technology.  Even though we may learn and adapt to our surroundings, we still need to process, understand and balance our emotions and thoughts.

Days later when we broached the subject again on her thick protective wall, I mentioned to her what can happen when we have walls up around us.  “I think people that put walls up feel more than those that don’t.  When I surrounded myself in the past with a thick shell, it didn’t stop me from getting hurt, even though isn't that the very idea?  In fact, I usually ended up getting hurt more so, feeling the pain even deeper than maybe I ever would have if the wall had not been there to begin with.  Not being open can turn people away.  This made and still makes me feel rejected and not wanted.  So the wall I used to protect myself, in the end I just ended up feeling more ache.”

This friend of mine is young and she’s been put through the ringer in the past.  I see a bit of myself in her.  I’ve been where she is.  I have experience similar situations as she has.  In my mind, I see the light at the end of the tunnel for her.  For me, I found the more I tried to protect myself, the more pain I would feel.  I have learned through trial and error what works and what doesn’t for me.  She will learn a similar lesson that will cater to her own situation and life path.  For me, now, I put myself out there more.  I’m not afraid to say ‘I love you’ when I mean it, to whom ever.  I know more about myself, my wants, my beliefs and I’m comfortable being in my own skin.  I can tell relatively fast if I will be compatible with someone, which helps me to gage the rate and velocity of my emotions.  This change in behavior aids my everyday life but also, I allow the rejection.  I allow myself to feel the pain for an instant and then move on.  I won’t let any negativity linger, a moment is too precious to waste.  Searching for shelter behind a wall is a thing of my past.  I look for wide-open spaces to skip freely and frolic with the other woodland creatures.  I can only hope that others come to the same conclusion.  Live in the love, not in the fear.

Find this piece on Nantucket Chronicle: The Wall Between Us

What I Did For Love

In college I was part of male/female cabaret group.  The time came for me to choose my solo song.  Having always been a fan of A Chorus Line, I decided to sing, "What I did for Love." This song relates the trials and tribulations of the sacrifices a dancer must make in order to be a dancer.  As a little girl, I had a hope of performing on Broadway.  In my heart, I knew I could be the best.  Given the right opportunity, I would shine.  When deciding on colleges, NYU was at the top of my list.  My thought was, “ make it to New York and everything will fall into place.”  Reality was, I wanted to skip university altogether.  My parents being who they are couldn’t support this notion.  I lived in a dream world, as most teenagers do.  My parents knew the harsh realities of the world.  Even if I did have talent, making it on Broadway was a slim shot.  Many have had to make certain sacrifices to obtain this desire.

When it came time to face reality, I realized I was a mediocre actress, talented at dance, but still somehow moved to a different beat.  When it came to my singing voice, even though I had talent, I always held back for fear of true success.

I can easily compare that to my actions in my romantic relationships. Being the good girlfriend while holding back.  Dancing to my own independent drummer, and on par when it came to commitment and holding steadfast. 

Comparing one of my greatest passions – theater and music - with another great passion – Love, I find myself returning to relationships past.  What did I do for love?  What did I give up?  When did I compromise?  When did I fight?  When did I surrender?

One relationship in particular comes to mind.  For us, the cards were all in, except one of us would have to sacrifice for the greater good of the relationship and for our love.  I had no problem playing this role.  After all, at the time, I believed I had found my soul mate.  I couldn’t imagine my life without him.  I couldn’t imagine him not being the father of my children.  When we were apart, it felt as though my heart had stopped beating.  I would feel the air escape from my lungs.  My blood would slowly stop pumping through my veins.  All the while knowing, the only remedy would be to see and hold him again.  I would have done anything in my power to make sure I never had to live without him.

As with any relationship, any love or passion, the truth will always be revealed, then a decision must be made whether or not you can live with that truth.  When this relationship came to that cross road, we both decided we couldn’t live with it and we would rather live without each other.  It wasn’t as if we were bad for each other, we just were not meant for each other.  When we said our good-byes, he validated my sacrifices, “If I didn’t have you, I would have never made it through these past few years.  I would have never been able to accomplish what I did.”

What have you done for love?  What did you do for your passion?   

Above all else, love is the greatest gift. The greatest gift we can give to another is to give ourselves.

Karma "Yoga on the Rock": Do you know what Seva is?

Photo by the beautiful Katie Kaizer.  She is an amazing photographer and Journalist.  See more of her work at http://www.katiekaizerphotography.com/

"Do you know what seva is? It’s the selfless act of being in service to anyone or anything that needs your helping hands. The more fully you give yourself to this calling now, the more amazing your world becomes."
~Stephanie Azaria

I pulled into the Cisco beach parking lot a little before 9AM Tuesday morning.  A line of surfers was already present on the water, waiting the moment they might catch The Wave. The sun was beginning to peek out from the clouds and I was certain this day was going to be especially beautiful. 

I scanned the line of cars for a grey Land-cruiser.  An open car door revealed a girl, relaxing, watching the waves slowing rolling onto the shore.  The back of the truck was open, a few coolers and beach gear barely filling up the back. I spotted what I was looking for: a set of yoga mats situated in a ‘ready to go’ position.  This must be the girl I was here to meet and she could not appear to be any cooler!  I grabbed my trash bag and headed over to the car. 

The woman’s feet moved and a petite dark brown-haired woman emerged from the truck.  “You must be Dorothy.” She had a sweet, calm and easy nature that instantly put me in relaxed mode.  She lifted her sunglasses to greet me, and her natural beauty radiated from within. 

“No make-up and stunning.  She’s a true Yogi,” I thought to myself as we finished our introductions.  We spoke for a while as we waited to see if any other participants would arrive.  When it was looking as though it would be just the two of us, I was sure she was going to call it off until another time…why clean the beach and teach a class with just one person? 

Samantha Rudofsky, has started a new initiative called Karma "Yoga on the Rock", which is open to anyone who wishes to participate.  Willing and able bodies may meet at Cisco beach parking lot on Tuesdays at 9AM for a half hour of beach clean-up.  Then, rewarding people’s efforts, Samantha will teach a free yoga class.  Karma "Yoga on the Rock"  is all about giving back to the community and the Earth. 

After five or ten minutes had passed, she looked at me and said, “Shall we start?”  Surprised and excited, I clutched my trash bag and followed her to the beach.  We started to walk along the dunes.  At first we were finding small pieces of debris.  As we picked up the cigarette butts and small pieces of paper, Samantha and I continued our chat.  I wanted to know more about her…why she was doing what she was doing.  Where she was from?  I’d never seen her before, but we have many mutual Facebook friends.  I wanted to know why she was doing Karma Yoga.  Being an Island girl, my appreciation for the island is deeply rooted in my veins.  More often than not, I see visitors to Nantucket have two notions in mind: Make money, and party.  They work whatever job they came here to do and partake in the nightlife/beach life.  Once the air starts to become cooler and the island population begins to diminish, so do the people who say they ‘love’ Nantucket so much.  It’s a rarity to see someone so focused on giving back.  Samantha was pleased by the very fact that I showed up.  She honored me in that moment.

I was entranced when Samantha started to explain her inspiration for Karma "Yoga on the Rock".

Samantha, who is the founder of Guru Chakra, LLC ~ Om Ack said, “There’s more to yoga than just poses,” as she picked up a piece of plastic off the beach and placed the debris in her trash bag.   As we got deeper into the conversation, I realized the place Samantha was coming from was Love.  Love of Nantucket, love of community, love of the Earth, a sheer love of life and everything living.  

At the very moment of feeling in awe of Samantha and what drives her, I discover that we are collecting quite a bit of trash off the beach.  When I first felt the sand between my feet this morning, the thought that traveled through my mind was “How much can two people really do?  How much trash are we really going to collect?  Will this even make a difference?”  My bag was starting to become heavier and I realized just what two people could really do.  Samantha hadn’t even started the yoga class and already I was learning something. 

Two other women soon joined us.  The four of us went up and down the beach collecting various items that were either left behind or had washed ashore.  I was shocked by some of the items we found.  In half an hour of cleaning, we found a large green chair, a full fisherman’s net, and a plastic bag from a supermarket full of apples, a large rusty tin can, and a plethora of deflated balloons, and so on.  The beach looked relatively clean before we started but to my surprise, it didn’t take long to fill up our trash bags. 

Once the trash had been collected we took a break.  Samantha brought fresh watermelon and water infused with lemons to quench our thirst.  We nibbled on the watermelon and sipped the much-needed refreshing water before gathering our yoga mats and heading down the beach.  With yoga mat, water bottle and towel in hand, I found I had difficulty making my way through the pliable sand.  If I am hardly able to walk in the sand, how am I going to practice yoga?  I hadn’t taken a yoga class in years and I was beginning to get nervous. 

Samantha picked a spot that was semi-shielded from the wind.  We staggered our yoga mats and she began the class.  (I thought, “Forgive me, Universe, for it has been years since my last real yoga class.”)  Even though I was slightly embarrassed by my lack of correct body alignment, Samantha was an ever humble and understanding teacher, reminding us all that the most important thing to remember was our breathing.  After her calming voice stated this, I listened to my body.  There were multiple occasions when I couldn’t hold the simplest of poses and I moved my body into child’s pose.  It felt right.  I listened to my body, and focused on my breath. At the end of the class, the other students and I were in a fetal position on our sides.  I had my eyes closed and fell into the yoga trance.

Participating in yoga on the beach is an experience I have come to find challenging, while at the same time addicting.  The natural elements, wind and sand, force one to be in the moment and work a little harder to stay standing.  While other natural forces like the crashing ocean waves, sunshine and slowly moving clouds allowed for a mesmerizing backdrop.  While barely being able to hold myself in a pose, I glanced up to the sky to see the brightest shade of blue I have ever seen.  I could feel my body sway with the wind and I could hear small, gentle waves meet the shoreline.  The atmosphere had an almost lullaby/rocking effect that I found serene.  I left that morning looking forward to next Tuesday’s class.  Thank you, Samantha for the gift of your time and showing me how I can give more of myself.

To sign up for Tuesday’s class email her at samantha@omnantucket.com

Samantha teaches Yoga and Pilates at The Studio on Nantucket as well private classes.

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GuruChakraLLC

Twitter: @omnantucket https://twitter.com/#!/OmNantucket

Website: http://www.guru-chakra.com/ (Will be up and running soon.)

~Namaste~

This post is also on Nantucket Chronicle under Wellness/Yoga.

You Look Like You Need A Hug

It's Monday...You look like you could use a hug.

Sexercises Are Back!

Over the recent months I have received a large amount of feedback in regard to The Sexercises in the original Amazing Love Diet.  I have a few persons that were against them, saying that it read like a Penthouse Forum.  (Not sure if this is a good or a bad thing.) And then, I had a great number of people that found they loved the Sexercises!  Some were very disappointed that I had taken them out.  For those of you out there that don't know what Sexercises are, these would be different sexual positions that will help to tone your body.  What could be wrong with that?  I just happen to explain briefly the benefits...Now, isn't that a fun tidbit of information.

Those that I've heard from in regard to the old version of Amazing Love Diet, said that most of the positions they already knew about.  For them, the Sexercises were a nice reminder to engage and explore with their partner.  I have heard that it was a nice refresher for their relationship.  I felt this feedback was powerful enough to add the Sexercises back into the book.  I had a large number of people who voted for the Sexercises, more so than those against them.  So...I did just that.  Amazing Love Diet now features Sexercises!  

Download or pick up Amazing Love Diet today!

Download digital copy from Amazon Here

Order Paperback from Lulu Here.

*****If you've purchased any version of Amazing Love Diet please email me at lazypersonaltraining@gmail.com and I will give you the latest version as a thank you.

Motivational Photos To Get You Started & Keep You Going

I have some guest blogger posts that I will share in the coming days...For now, here is something from the Secret Blogger for you to enjoy! 

Motivational Photo #3 - Be Stronger Than Fear

The Secret Blogger is on a roll with this one.  Nothing could ring more true in day to day life.  We all have fear, it's a choice of what we allow fear to do to us or what we do to fear.  Life your life to the fullest!

What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger

Guest Blogger: How To Do A Stability Ball Squat

When I asked Greg how does one do a stability ball squat, his answer was, "Pray."  Greg makes standing on an inflated ball look easy and fun to achieve.

I have been fortunate to gather some incredible guest bloggers for the next few weeks. I am very excited about today’s post from professional hockey player Greg Mauldin. I approached him about doing a Lazy Post since his reputation preceded him as someone who is passionate and dedicated to health and fitness. After-all, his profession requires that his body always be running at 100%!


I will be honest with you, I didn’t know much about Greg’s career when I first spoke with him. After a little research, I soon discovered that this approachable player is a fan-favorite in every city he plays. It didn’t take me long to understand why. He has the perfect combination of humility, passion, and dedication one would hope for in a professional athlete. The brief time I have spent talking with Greg has already shown me how dedicated he is to respect the limits of his body, and taking care of himself mentally and physically. He has inspired me to do the same. (I’ve already thought about going to workout twice today!)   I hope he will inspire you as well.


Here is Greg doing a Stability Ball Squat. His explanation is easy to follow. It may take a few tries or days to achieve, but push yourself a little more each time. Make sure the stability ball is fully inflated. (I learned this the hard way and now my booty is slightly bruised.)  Can not stress enough to have your core fully engaged at all times.  This is key in any stability ball training.


HOW TO DO A SQUAT USING A STABILITY BALL

1. Sit on the ball without your calves touching the ball. Balance using your core.

 2. Now try just having your hands and knees touching the ball.  See if you can support yourself and balance doing that while keeping your core tight.

4. Grab onto a bar or person.  Try standing on the ball.

Make sure your core is tight and you squeeze the ball with your feet.  You'll feel it in your hips, thighs and groin if you don't do it right.

 How To Do The Actual Squat 

While keeping your balance, slowly lower your body, while bending your legs and keep your core tight.  Your knees should not move past your toes Keep squatting until you are in a seated position.















 Next, while maintaining your balance and core engaged, begin to lift your body and come to the standing position.

















Greg Mauldin is currently a center for the Lake Erie Monsters in Cleveland Ohio.  If you’re in the area go root him on!  If you can’t make it to a game, then follow him on Twitter, @gmaul20

There Are No Tricks, Just Hard Work

The Secret Blogger strikes again!  Here is another motivational photo for Fit Week.  I couldn't agree more with this photo.  Remember to put yourself as priority one.  Don't over do it.  Health is about balance.

Guest Blogger: Motivational Photo For How To Live Your Life

This is a motivational photo from The Secret Blogger.  This guest blogger has quite a few motivational photos that we all can use.  This one in particular I love!  (More photos to come!)  I hope this story will make an imprint that will keep you persevering through the tough times and rough waters.

The World Owes You Nothing...

This world doesn’t owe you a happy romantic relationship.

This world doesn’t owe you an amazing, healthy body.

This world doesn’t owe you success and all the richest in the world.

This world doesn’t owe you anything.

Once you learn this you’ll start to find happiness...maybe even find you already have so much to be happy about.  We have to work for happiness. 


I often hear of people becoming frustrated over life and really, maybe, they should be.  Sometimes, life just isn’t fair.  Your co-worker gets promoted over work that you completed.  Your heart has been broken over and over again.  You discover you have lung cancer without having a single cigarette in your life.  You’ve lost it all.  You’ve hit rock bottom.

I have a little story for you...There once was a single mother, on her last penny.  She had no idea of how she was going to put food on the table or support her family.  Within five years of her hitting rock bottom, a “failure” as she has said in interviews, she became a millionaire.  Her name?  J.K Rowling, she's now a billionaire, just so you know.  She went on to write a Book Series that would change her life and her family’s circumstances forever.  You may know it, Harry Potter?  It wasn’t an easy journey, multiple publishing houses rejected her manuscript.  I bet they are kicking themselves on that one.  But she powered through, didn't she?  “And so rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” J.K. Rowling in 2008.

We are all one moment away from greatness.  Greatness can be found in smiling at every single person you meet through out your day.  Greatness could mean curing cancer or just beating it.  Greatness could mean loving someone everyday for who they really are.  The world doesn’t owe you anything but you do owe the world something...What will it be?  You may never write a best seller.  You may never be someone that people look to for help.  You may not even be of any great importance. That’s not the point.  The point is to stay true to yourself.  To find out what you can contribute.  What are your talents?...The world doesn’t owe you anything...But you do owe the world just one small piece of yourself.

Want to know what my greatness moment will be?  When I finally learn to spell,  have correct grammar and punctuation...Sadly someday...Until then, you'll just have to be patient with my short-comings.

***This video is of a acoustic session with one of my favorite music artist, James Morrison. I adore him.  One Life is a new song off of his new album. ***

How Are You Today?

My mind is in Barcelona today...This building is apart of Park Guell...Beautiful Gaudi Designs and Architecture.

***First, just a quick update...I have been under the weather so I have not kept up with my Yoga Challenge.  I have completed Day 1...I will post to Facebook in the Notes section the Yoga Challenge updates.  Thank you.***

I would like to discuss 'Checking In'.  No this is not what we're all doing on our iPhones when we get to whatever bar or restaurant.  This is checking in with yourself.  A good friend of mine recently walked me through his daily routine.  First thing in the morning he takes a walk to clear his mind and wake up his body.  During his walk he asks himself, "How am I doing today?"  This 'checking in' with himself is a great tool and leveler for everyone to use in their everyday life.

Ask yourself today how you're doing?  If you're happy, play off of that.  If you're upset about something, get to the bottom of the problem, so that you may focus on the good in life.

How are you today?

A Pure Heart Is The Greatest Weapon

I Am At My Happiest When I Am Playing & Exploring With The Babes.

I may not be as innocent as I once was but I have never lost my childhood enthusiasm.  I get excited when I see a butterfly...I jump on the bed in every hotel room I visit...I make a wish when I blow out candles on my birthday...I still sing into my hairbrush...And I am always looking for someone to play tag with.  My body may have changed, but my heart never did.

What Is The Meaning You Give To Your Life?

I climbed to the top of a mountain and all I got was this bloody photo.

A long time ago, I decided my life would be about Love.  I would do all the things that I love...I would gorge my senses...I would always be learning...Traveling...I would always be loving...I would be in pursuit of everything that I love...Because of this, I am for the most part, happy.  I have failed at times.  I have failed in some of my endeavors in regard to everything that I love...But because I followed my true self, when it comes down to it,  I never actually was unsuccessful.  I have taken chances. Some chances have proved to be a great success and it was difficult to wipe the smiles off my face.  Other chances, I try to learn, forget and move on from.  I have always believed, that every failure is a triumph.  Why?  Because hopefully, I will learn something from the upset.  The next time I am faced with a challenge or a bump in the road, I will be better equipped and ready.  When I look back on my small life so far, I have come to appreciate the bumps and the glitches.  Maybe even more so than those of my successes and joyful moments. 

My love of writing is a cruel love...I have to remind myself to not compare myself to other writers.  Yes, there will always be someone smarter, more creative and better at spelling than myself.  I can only work with what I have and try to improve upon that of which I fall short.  I have to remember why I do what I do. I need to remember, why I write what I write.  Is it for the masses? Perhaps.  It is my hope others enjoy what I write, gain something from it and maybe they are entertained.  When it comes down to the nifty gritty, mainly, I write for me.  I write because it makes me feel joy.  I write because sometimes it’s torture to keep feelings, thoughts and emotions inside.  I write because if I die tomorrow, I want to know at least I tried to live the best possible life I could.

Writing, to me, is like making love.  It brings me great joy and pleasure, I could do it all day and I’m not that bad at doing it on my own.

What is the meaning that you give to your life? 

Skinny Dipping

I took this photo a few years ago while visiting Portugal...I just wanted to jump in.  Water is my religion.  It's what I love and fear the most in this world.

When I was younger, I would sneak into the swimming pool area of our house.  I would first get the key to the cabana.  Unlock the dark brown wooded door, change into my pink Strawberry Shortcake bathing suit and then climb the fence to the pool.  I was only able to do this once and awhile.  My Mother watched us like a hawk...Luckily, every now and then, my blind uncle would baby-sit us while she was out running a few errands and she didn’t want six crazy kids to reek havoc on her agenda.  Good grief we were a hand-full.  I have no idea how my Mother got through it unscathed.  On a few occasions, while my blind uncle watched us or really listened to us, I ran away for fear he was going to make me watch the tv show M.A.S.H. 

Be Fearless

{via little.lovely}

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or saying that we are not ready.  The challenge will not wait.  Life does not look back. A moment is more than enough time for us to decided whether or not to accept our destiny. ” - The Devil and Miss Prym by Paulo Coelho.



We have two days left in the first month of the year.  Finish what you can and plan for what you can't.  Before we enter into The Month of Love, I want you to clear away all the bad and the negative.  February will be a fresh, new month.  Which means, just like that you will have a new beginning.  So prepare for that new beginning.  What you give in your attitude is what you will receive.  Whatever your focus is on; good or bad thoughts, they will grow.  Make sure you go into your new start with positive vibes.  If you’ve been having any difficulty this past month, take a look at the problem from a different prospective.  Learn from your mistakes. Turn whatever negative or energy draining situation, into something more.  If need be, look at your situation from the outside looking in.  What would someone see from the other side?  Or maybe pretend to be the person you most respect and ask yourself, “How would they handle the situation?  What would they do?”  If you were in a funk the whole month, change one part of your daily routine.  You may find yourself breathing new life into your soul.  We are all afraid of change.  We all have fears.  Don’t let your fear get in the way of being truly great.  Be Fearless.