Monday, February 13, 2012

Dating Disaster #1

I always feel more comfortable telling dating stories when they are very much in the past.  This way, most parties involved have moved on and more than likely, they don’t give a rats whether I use their story as an example or not.

Recently I realized, I haven’t put some of my embarrassing dating moments on my blog?  And boy do I have them!  I am super awkward and even more so when I really like someone.  Sometimes my awkward, clumsiness is just who I am.  Other humiliating moments unfortunately happen because I am nervous or excited...Beverages being spilled all over the dinner because I talk with my hands...Choking on a piece of food because I started laughing while I was eating...Getting my hair caught in tree branches because I wasn’t looking where I was going...Sitting at the wrong table when I venture back from the ladies room...”Wait you’re not my date!”...Then slam my finger in a car door, while trying to find cover from the rain...Yes, there is a surplus of awkward, awful dating moments that I have experienced...Most of the time I know these dates won’t be calling for another meet up.  Other occurrences, I am always surprised when they do call again... "Huh, Really?  I wasn’t expecting to hear from you again, unless it was for the cleaning bill for the spaghetti accident.  Yes, my nose is
fine...How is your foot?  Sorry about that.”

One of my favorite dating disaster stories I will share today.  I went on a date with a guy I had no interest in dating.  I said yes to the date but he wasn’t what I typically go for.  I always try to have an open mind.  He was nice enough and good looking but there wasn’t a spark.  Which I most certainly need.  Still, I was awkward and he was awkward, so it made for a good time.  He took me to play pool, which I absolutely love.  I’ve been playing since I was a little girl.  There are moments in this game where I really shine...This particular event was not one of them.  This gentlemen picked out the table and racked up the balls.  He asked if I wanted to break since he racked.  “Sure!”  I was excited.  I try to practice breaking as often as possible since it’s where I fall short in the game of pool.  I had my pool cue in hand, aimed and sliced the cue ball, propelling it forward.  It ripped right through, sending a solid ball into a corner pocket.  I smiled and quickly became cocky.  I glanced over the table...What will be my best shot to take?  I’m not one of those girls that finds it pleasurable to lose.  Nor am I one of those girls that likes the guy to beat me in anything.  I may not be good at something, but I will put up a good fight.  I saw my shot, solid in the left corner pocket.  My date was standing right by the pocket, watching me.  It was a bit of a difficult shot.  So I slightly got up on the table to better square myself with the ball.  I aimed and with force shot the cue ball right into my date’s crotch.  He immediately fell to the ground, holding his man bits.  I rushed over to him, “I am so so sorry!  Are you ok?  I'll go get you some ice.”  He couldn’t speak for a few minutes but he was shaking his head "no". When he was finally able to speak, I could see him trying to muster all of his strength to be strong and get up off the ground. 

“I’m ok...Let’s keep going.”  He was trying to breathe.

 “Are you sure?”  I felt bad, especially when he was walking with a slight limp.  I can only imagine what was going through him mind...”Just walk it off...You’re ok...You’re ok.”

“Yup, yup. I’m good.”  I could see the color come back into his face.

“Ok, well it’s your shot, I scratched the ball.”  This made him laugh and I felt better for it...Poor, poor man...If you’re reading this, I am so sorry.

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